The wedding ceremony has rather ancient roots, it originates from the IX – X centuries and has not only beautiful content, but also has a deep meaning. Wedding is a rite that unites a man and a woman in front of God for eternal love and loyalty, turning marriage into a sacrament related to spiritual being.
The essence of the wedding
In the modern world, unfortunately, many people misinterpret the very essence of the sacrament and treat this church rite as a fashionable and beautiful event that can brighten up the solemn day of marriage. Without even thinking that a wedding is not a mere formality. Only those people who believe in the eternity of marriage on earth and in heaven should take this step. And to make such a decision is possible only with mutual consent, as a deliberate and well thought out act. It should not be forgotten that the ceremony is one of the seven sacraments, as a result of which the grace of the Holy Spirit is transmitted to man, and this happens in an invisible way.
If, nevertheless, the relationship in the couple is time tested, the feelings are deep, and the desire to perform the rite is well weighed, then you should familiarize yourself with the conditions without which the wedding in the Orthodox Church is impossible. The rules are binding:
- The basis for the wedding is a marriage certificate.
- The main role in the family is assigned to the husband, who must love his wife selflessly. And the wife must obey her husband in good faith.
It is the husband who is obliged to keep the family in touch with the church. Debunking is allowed only in the most emergency situations, for example, when one of the spouses changes or in case of mental illness. By the way, the latter can also be the cause of failure in the wedding.
In ancient times there was such a custom, when young people petitioned the priest for a wedding, he announced this at the national assembly, and only after a while, if there were no people who could report about the impossibility of marriage, was the ceremony performed.
The total number of person's weddings over a lifetime cannot exceed three times.
Only baptized young people and their witnesses are allowed to the rite, each must have a cross.
If someone from the crowning does not know whether he is baptized or not, it is necessary to discuss this issue with the priest. As a rule, a positive answer is possible with the consent of the young to give birth and raise children, following the Orthodox traditions.
Age restrictions: men should be at least 18 years old, and women should be at least 16.
A wedding is a primitive Christian rite, therefore people professing another religion (Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, etc.) and atheists are not allowed to attend it.
The wedding ban is imposed if the bride and groom are related to each other, even in the fourth generation. And undesirable marriage between godparents and godchildren.
If one of the newlyweds has a side marriage, the wedding is prohibited.
But such circumstances as the pregnancy of the wife, or if the newlyweds do not have a parental blessing, are not a reason for the refusal of the wedding.
When can you hold a wedding?
According to the Orthodox calendar, weddings can be held throughout the year, with the exception of major fasting days - Christmas (from November 28 to January 6), Great (seven weeks before Easter), Petrov Post (from the second Monday after the Trinity until July 12), Ouspensky ( from 14 to 27 August), Maslenitsa, on the eve of all major church holidays. Wedding ceremonies are held on Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. But, according to popular belief, Wednesday and Friday are not suitable for the sacrament. It is also better to avoid the wedding on the 13th.
But the most happy for marriage are the periods after the Intercession in the autumn, from Baptism to Maslenitsa in winter, between Petrov and Ouspensky fasting in summer, to Red Hill in the spring.
Many couples want to get married on the day of the official marriage registration, but you can't call it correct. Priests, as a rule, discourage young people from this kind of hasty actions. Best of all, when couples get married on the anniversary of their wedding or after the birth of children. The later it happens, the more conscious this act will be. The wedding year will be a memorable event that will testify to the sincerity of feelings and confidence in family ties.
Of particular importance is the process of preparing for such a ritual as the wedding in the Orthodox Church. The rules are also present here.
The very first thing that needs to be done is to decide on the church and the priest who will conduct the ceremony. This is quite a responsible task, since the choice must be made by the soul. Young people in the temple should be comfortable and calm, the only way the whole process will have really great value. Whether this is a small church or a majestic cathedral depends primarily on the wishes of the young, the whole atmosphere of the holy place should fit harmoniously not only into the spiritual essence of the ceremony, but also to respond to the emotional state of the young couple who decided to tie their fate forever.
It is also necessary to talk with the father, discuss not only organizational issues, but also look at each other, find a common language - this is also very important for the ceremony. Very many priests pay special attention to the conversation with the newlyweds, sometimes they can advise to postpone the procedure or to postpone, then the advice of the priest should be heeded.
Still, not least, not all priests have the right to hold a wedding ceremony, for example, it is forbidden to do this as a monk and under canonical prohibitions. Sometimes a priest at the request of a young couple may be conducted by a clergyman from another church or cathedral, for example, if he is their spiritual father.
Organizational moments of the ceremony
The priest must agree on the date and time for which the Orthodox wedding is scheduled. The rules of church life require this. Sometimes in the church several couples can get married at the same time, this nuance also needs to be discussed. You should be worried if several operators will conduct photo and video filming for the wedding, so that there is no confusion and this does not spoil the whole ceremony.
Even a week before the wedding, young people should begin to observe fasting: not to eat meat, not to drink alcohol, not to smoke, to refrain from marital intimacy. Before the wedding, the newlyweds should attend worship, confess and take communion.
It is also necessary to take care in advance about buying icons of the Savior and the Mother of God, which must be consecrated, wedding rings, which must be given to the priest, candles, two white towels and four handkerchiefs before the ceremony. It should be noted that, according to church canons, rings should be bought for the groom of gold, for the bride of silver. As a rule, the acquisition of all necessary attributes is assigned to witnesses.
The tradition of using icons in a wedding ceremony also has ancient historical roots. Since ancient times, parents have blessed their children with the use of holy icons: the son - Christ the Savior, the daughter - of the Virgin, thus giving guidance to the true path.
It is customary to leave a reward for holding the wedding ceremony, and the priest should also ask about the money. If the couple does not have the financial ability to pay the full amount in full, you can tell about it. Sometimes the sum is not announced at all, and the priest offers to give alms to the church, in the amount that is provided possible for the newlyweds.
Choosing a dress for the bride
As for the wedding dress of the bride, which she will wear at the wedding in the Orthodox Church, the rules are as follows:
- the dress should not be very tight or short, but too lush and chic outfits will not work either,
- in no case should not be bare shoulders, neck or hands above the elbows,
- you can use a cape that covers the exposed parts of the body,
- the dress should be white or another color of pale shades,
- the head must be covered, for this a scarf or veil is used,
- You can not use too bright makeup and rich aroma of perfumes
- instead of a wedding bouquet in the hands of the bride should be a wedding candle.
You should also take care of the shoes in advance, shoes with closed chuck on low heels are best suited, because the wedding ceremony lasts about an hour, the bride should feel comfortable throughout this time.
There is a very interesting belief. The bride's dress must be with a long train. According to folklore, the longer the train will be - the more time the young will be together. If the train is not provided in the dress, it can be attached only for the duration of the wedding.
Also, when the wedding takes place in the Orthodox Church, the rules apply to the appearance of all the guests present. Women should be in dresses or skirts with covered knees, and should not expose the neckline and hands, the head should be covered with a scarf or scarf. At the wedding ceremony, the presence of all the guests of the wedding is not necessarily, it can be people who truly believe in the sacrament of the ceremony and treat this process sincerely. To comply with the formality of such events is better not to attend, and only come to the banquet.
Wedding always begins only after service. The ceremony consists of two stages: the first is the engagement, the wedding is the second stage. In the past, they were divided by time. After the betrothal, the couple could part, if there were any reasons for that, the wedding could take place only if the feelings were strong and sincere, because the husband and wife chose each other not only for earthly life, but forever. In modern ritual, both components of the ceremony occur on the same day.
The betrothal takes place at the entrance to the church. The bride is on the left hand of the groom. The priest reads a prayer, after which he blesses the couple three times and gives them lighted candles. He reads a prayer again and betrays the young with rings. The rings change from the hand of the young to the hand of the bride three times; as a result, the groom's golden ring remains on the young's hand, and her silver ring is on the future husband's finger. Only now a couple can call themselves bride and groom.
The priest leads a couple into the temple and places the lectern on a white towel. The man and the woman are asked if they came here of free will, whether there are any obstacles to entering into marriage. Witnesses take the crowns in their hands and hold them above the heads of the bride and groom. It should be noted here that it is not so easy to do this, especially if the witnesses are short, and the young are tall, and the ceremony time is not less than forty minutes in the city churches, and if the ceremony is held in the monastery, then more than an hour. Therefore, it is advisable to choose witnesses higher. After the prayers read, the young people endure a cup of wine, which they have to drink three times as a symbol of the fact that from this moment everything in the pair will be divided equally - both happiness and bitterness.
It is necessary to warn the bride: during drinking from the cup of wine there can be a situation when the veil will be very close to the candle and ignite. To avoid this, it is advisable to worry in advance about the length of the veil, which should not be too large.
The hands of the newlyweds are tied with a white towel and encircled around the lectern three times. At this time the church choir sings. The priest brings a couple to the Royal Gates of the altar and reads the edification of eternal life together. After the wedding, all the guests begin to congratulate the young, and the bell rings, which marks the birth of a young family.
If young people have a desire to capture a wedding for a long memory, photo and video can be done with the permission of the priest. It is most correct to agree on exactly where the operator should be, how he should better stand or move. Usually, in churches and cathedrals, specific lighting is sufficient, so that in order for the quality of the shooting not to upset you, it is advisable to turn to a good specialist. There are cases when shooting is strictly prohibited, then, so that the memorable event remains in the family archives, you can take photos against the background of the cathedral or temple.
There is another ancient custom, which should be mentioned in order to bring some historical clarity, the wedding of the kingdom. This rite was performed during the coronation ceremony of monarchs, and Ivan the Terrible began it first. The crown, which was used in this case, went down in history under the well-known name of all - the Monomakh's hat. Mandatory attributes of the action were barmas, orb and scepter. And the process itself had a sacred content, the main essence of which was the sacrament of anointing. But this ceremony has nothing to do with the marriage.
What is a church wedding?
Wedding - one of the oldest religious traditions, which is inherent not only to Christianity, but also to other religions. It was the wedding that meant the entry of people into legal marriage, and in our country only after the revolution, marriages began to take place in the registry offices. However, in recent years, the wedding tradition has been revived, although this ritual does not have any legal force, but it is extremely important for believers.
They say that the wedding ceremony in the church is the marriage before God. So, people entering into a church marriage want this sincerely, with all their hearts, and intend to live all their lives with each other in love and harmony.
That is why it is worth warning against the wedding of those who want to go for it only at the behest of fashion or because of the beauty of the ceremony, which will decorate the wedding film. If you do not believe, if you are not sincere in your desire to marry in heaven, and if you obey only the spiritual impulse to be in trend, then beware of the wedding. And even better - think. You have a lot of time, because it is not necessary to hold a wedding on the wedding day, the ceremony can be held at any time.
It is not superfluous to say that dissolving a church marriage is incomparably more difficult than the official one. Why? The fact is that the dissolution of a marriage made in heaven is only for the bishops - the clergy of the highest degree of priesthood. So after divorce they go not to church, but directly to the bishop of their diocese.
The two unite in unity.
Before you establish yourself in the decision to get married, you must understand:
- Church marriage can not be terminated! No “debunking” exists in principle. The fact that some bishops are going to meet people who have already been divorced and live in other families - because of the weakness of the modern "Christians". This is done so that people do not fall into great sins. Therefore, we must realize that the wedding - forever!
Basic requirements for those who wish to get married in church:
- the newlyweds should be baptized in the Orthodox Church (this can be done before the wedding),
- people must enter into a civil marriage (in the registry office) - testimony is required in many churches (if people are not permanent parishioners),
- before the wedding you need to confess and take communion.
This is the spiritual side. Also in the parishes where the parishioners are responsible, the priest necessarily conducts a preliminary conversation with the young. He explains to them the whole meaning of this rite, which is not only a tribute to tradition. You should not get married just for the sake of beautiful photos or because “it’s so accepted”. This is the profanation of the Sacrament.
Favorable wedding days
So you decided to get married, when is the best time to do this? Most auspicious day - Sunday, but you need to remember that on Sunday many couples want to get married, and you need to take care of the ritual in advance. Also, wedding in the church is held on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, and, respectively, on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays, the sacrament of weddings is not performed.
The wedding is held only in the middle of the day, but not in the evening. This is explained not so much by religious traditions as by trivial problems with time: the rite lasts for several hours, and even starting in the afternoon, it ends in the evening.
And, finally, when choosing a wedding date, you need to focus not only on favorable wedding days, but also on daysforbidden"- these days, no church or temple will marry you:
- Svyatki (January 7-20),
- On the eve of the Meeting of the Lord (February 14),
- Cheese Week (seven days before the beginning of Lent, better known as Maslenitsa, in 2016 from March 7 to 13)
- On the eve of the Annunciation of the Most Holy Theotokos (April 6),
- In Lent (seven weeks before Easter, in 2016 from March 14 to April 30),
- On Easter week (in 2016 - from May 1 to May 7),
- On the eve of the Ascension of the Lord (the 39th day after Easter, in 2016 - June 8)
- В канун и день Святой Троицы (49-й и 50-й день после Пасхи, в 2016 году – 18 и 19 июня),
- В Петров пост (начинается во второй понедельник после Троицы, в 2016 году с 27 июня по 11 июля),
- В Успенский пост (с 14 по 27 августа),
- В канун и день Усекновения Главы Иоанна Предтечи (10 и 11 сентября),
- В канун Рождества Пресвятой Богородицы (20 сентября),
- В канун и день Воздвижения Креста Господня (26 и 27 сентября),
- On the eve of the Protection of the Most Holy Theotokos (October 13),
- In the Christmas (or Filippov) post (from November 28 to January 6).
As you can see, there are not so many days for a wedding in a year, and therefore it is not always possible to hold a wedding on the wedding day - in order to “join” both ceremonies, you need to try a lot.
Basic wedding rules
Marriage in the registry office is incomparably easier than in the face of the gentlemen - the rite, held for centuries with little or no change, contains many actions and rituals that symbolize various stages of a person’s life, purify the soul, prepare it for marriage, and finally fasten souls and hearts of two people in eternal union. It makes no sense to describe the entire wedding ceremony in the church - a priest in the church will tell you about this. However, you need to pay attention to several important points in the preparation and conduct of the wedding ceremony.
The first and main rule of the wedding: go to church or temple. A meeting with a clergyman is necessary to select a wedding date, as well as receive advice and guidance. Also be sure to confess and take Communion in order to enter into marriage with a clear conscience and soul.
Requirements before the wedding ceremony
Epiphany. Newlyweds, as well as their witnesses, should be baptized and should wear crosses on themselves during the rite. If someone is not baptized, he can be baptized, but if this person does not consciously accept the faith (an atheist or a representative of another faith), then he cannot take part in the rite.
Official marriage. A hundred years ago, you would be married, and the record in the church book would serve as official confirmation of the legality of your marriage. Now there are other times, and in the church the marriage certificate entered into the registry office will be asked first. That is why it is forbidden to hold a wedding before the wedding, more precisely - before the official marriage ceremony.
Speech and church traditions. The most important thing in a wedding ceremony is the inner preparation of a person. We are once again forced to repeat that the wedding is not just a beautiful ceremony, but the entry of two people into a new life, the adoption of church laws, and a marriage concluded in the presence of the Lord. Therefore, a few days before the wedding, the newlyweds confess, receive communion, and receive instruction from a spiritual mentor. Also, it is necessary to observe fasting for a certain time (including smoking is prohibited) and to pray a lot. Finally, on the night before the wedding, the newlyweds cannot have intimate relations.
Wedding items. To hold a wedding ceremony, you need to purchase several things: icons of the Virgin and Jesus Christ (they are later passed on from generation to generation by descendants), wedding candles, wedding rings and a white towel (towel). All these things have their own symbolism (candles - ardent love and pure relationships, rings - eternity and continuity of union, white towel - purity of marriage) and after the rite are always kept in the family until the end of life.
Parents. After the wedding, the priest invites parents to bless the bride and groom to live together, having painted them with icons.
Witnesses. Wedding ceremony in the church is impossible without witnesses. Surprisingly, it is best to choose two men as witnesses. Why? Just because these people will have to keep crowns over their heads for a long time, which have considerable weight and tire their hands a lot. Naturally, the witnesses must be baptized.
Photo and video. The wedding ceremony is very beautiful and majestic, and therefore photographers and videographers must come to the church or the temple. However, you can’t just shoot like that - you need to receive the blessing of a clergyman. Also, it is impossible to bypass the priest and those getting married on the east side, only from the west.
Of course, the wedding rules are negotiated only on the outside of this ceremony, but you need to understand and remember that the main thing here is to want to get married with all your heart and soul. Otherwise, even a marriage concluded in heaven and in the face of the Lord, in fact will not be so desirable and durable.
Suit, wedding dress
There are certain requirements for the side of the bride and the groom. The bride should have a white dress for the wedding of a classic cut, this rule also applies to aged brides - the bride must appear in front of the Lord in a white dress (if the first wedding, and if the second is pink). The head of the bride should cover veil, headscarf or other headdress. And before the rite it is best to change into comfortable shoes with low heels or no heels at all: it is very hard to stand for several hours on high heels.
And at the expense of make-up, the modern church is loyal enough, the main thing is that it should not be screaming and provocative. The best option - the complete lack of makeup, but the work of a makeup artist does not interfere with the wedding ceremony.
The appearance of the groom demands much less, most important of them - the groom should be just in a smart suit. No frills, all modest and within the bounds of decency.
Therefore, if you are holding a wedding on the wedding day, then you need to think about your wedding dress to meet church requirements, or take care of a special dress for the wedding, which you can change into just before the wedding. And if you are holding a wedding after the wedding, then in this case you can buy without haste or order a special dress with a veil or veil that will be on you all day.
The state places certain restrictions on marriage, but even more restrictions on weddings in the Church. Here are just the main ones:
- The wedding ceremony is not carried out without entry into official marriage,
- Wedding is impossible if one or both newlyweds not baptized or have another faith
- Not allowed kinship newlyweds up to the fourth knee,
- Church marriage is impossible with significant difference at the age of the bride and groom, or if the age of one or both newlyweds does not correspond to the legal framework for marriage,
- Cannot marry people who were in married three or more times,
- The obstacle to the wedding are various mental illness one or both newlyweds.
- These prohibitions are not too strict, but they all pale before one, the most important: The wedding ceremony in the church is by no means carried out without the blessing of the parents.
It may seem that this rule is already outdated, and no one will check whether the parents have given their blessing or not. However, a clear conscience and pure thoughts - a pledge of a happy church marriage.
What is needed for the ceremony
Wedding in the Orthodox Church is carried out according to certain rules. The procedure and the necessary prayers are recorded in a special book - the Book of Requests, which the cleric has. Worry about this is not worth it, although it is necessary to understand what stage of the sacrament is carried out.
Usually for such requirements, a donation is provided. Everything can be negotiated directly in the temple. "Price" can vary greatly, depending on the temple. Other costs will be required.
- Icons of the Savior and the Virgin are needed for parents to bless their children.
- Towel - according to the rules, in the church young people become on a white towel.
- Special candles - for the bride and groom, usually sold in the shop.
- Rings - used in the Orthodox wedding ceremony.
These are the highlights, everything else is cooked in the temple. It is important to determine the date, prepare for this event spiritually. You also need to decide how many choristers will be, they usually need to be paid separately. Singers, as a rule, are not in the state of the church, but come only to the services or requirements (weddings, funerals, baptisms).
Rules of the rite
Wedding in the church is carried out in the prescribed manner. Usually it follows the Liturgy, where the young should take communion. Before this, one should stew (fast), read certain prayers — there is detailed material on this site on our site. Such spiritual preparation is necessary in order to receive the Sacrament of marriage with a pure soul.
Witnesses used to play not only the role of those who hold the crowns. They were charged for the newlyweds, usually they were those who have long been familiar with them. Guarantors assumed the obligation to look after the spiritual situation in the new union. After all, it is a small church, which was created with the aim of giving birth and raising children in piety. Therefore, the witnesses were people of solid age, having their own families. Today it is, rather, a tribute to tradition - the wedding will be held without witnesses.
According to the rules, the wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church begins with a betrothal. Previously, it was held separately, but now it is very rare to find one. Young people stand before the doors of the temple, as before the Lord Himself. The priest introduces them to the church, as if the first people — to heaven, where they must lead a pure life.
- The priest censes, sanctifying the young. He blesses the bride and groom, then gives them candles. After blessing should be baptized. This is done three times.
- Candlelight is a symbol of love, pure and hot, that spouses must feed.
- The deacon reads special litany for which all who come to the temple can pray.
- The priest reads a secret prayer for the newlyweds.
Then they bring rings, which are put on with a prayer first to the bridegroom, then to the bride. Three times they will be changed by them - in a sign that all now they have in common. The ring is a sign of eternal union, readiness to sacrifice everything for the sake of the beloved After the prayer, the betrothal ends and the wedding ceremony begins.
Continuing to hold candles, the young ones pass to the center of the temple, a special psalm is sung. A couple stands on a towel, in front of them on a lectern (special stand) there are crowns, the Gospel, a cross. Crowns in Orthodoxy mean not so much triumph as martyrdom. It’s not so easy throughout life to endure all the shortcomings of your spouse, to be a support for the family, to support your “half”. Therefore, the special assistance of God is sought in the sacrament.
The priest will ask each in turn whether they have a voluntary desire to get married, you must answer in the affirmative. Also, the question arises whether the heart was not promised to someone else. In some churches they are allowed to answer in Russian, and not in Church Slavonic. Then follow three special prayers — one to Christ, two to the Triune God.
Only after that the crowns are taken (whence the name of the sacrament is the wedding), they are prayerfully assigned to the young, the Holy Scripture is read.
Then, after short prayers, both are given wine from the same cup. Also in a sign that the young are now waiting for a common life. Then they tie their hands to the husband and wife, they bypass the priest around the lectern for three times.
- What is akathist, kondak and troparion
- Rules of conduct in the church - learn here
- Icons for blessing young people before the wedding - https://bogolub.info/ikony-dlya-blagosloveniya-molodyx-pered-svadboj/
The ceremony ends with the presentation of icons, instruction from the confessor. A meal, if it continues to worship, should be decent, befitting a Christian title, without drunkenness, dancing, violent fun.
How to behave in the temple
In the church there are unspoken rules of conduct that should not be violated. The wedding ceremony is held "by request", but this does not mean that you are dressed up with a censer. Should not, imitating the "stars" of television, behave provocatively.
- Witnesses and other participants in the ceremony should not forget that they are in the house of God. Laughter, talk are inappropriate, if there is no desire to pray at all, it is better to leave the church altogether until the Liturgy is over. So at least you will not distract the parishioners who have come to pay their debt to the Lord.
- The bride and groom must learn in advance the words that should be spoken during the ceremony. This is a simple respect not only for the priest, but also for God.
- You should not shock others with your appearance - the bride's dress should be closed. Or you need to buy a cape that would cover the shoulders, back and neck. Lipstick must be wiped off before service.
- Women should enter the church with their heads covered, skirts should be below the knee. Too bright makeup is also inappropriate.
The beauty of the wedding ceremony should be remembered forever young, but also to remind of the deep meaning of Christian marriage - love, patience, sacrifice. It is possible to withstand such a test adequately only by being in the bosom of the Church, attending services, participating in the Sacraments. God bless you!
Who, and under what conditions can you get married?
First you need to find out if you can get married at all without breaking the rules. In order for you to be married in a church, you must give the priest your marriage certificate, but this does not say that it is your marriage that can be blessed by the church.
For example, the church imposes some age restrictions on newlyweds, the groom must be at least 18 years old, and the bride must be at least 16 years old.
The next limit is the number of marriages of one of the spouses already concluded. If before this wedding, at least one of the spouses was married more than three times, then the fourth and subsequent unions are no longer approved by the church.
The rules of the wedding ceremony do not end there. Those who marry cannot be in blood ties, in the case of the Orthodox Church, up to the third degree of kinship.
The same applies to spiritual relatives, for example, if they are the godparents of one child. Also, the church does not bless marriages in which at least one of the newlyweds suffers from mental disorders. The same applies to non-baptized people, as well as if the bridegroom or bride of another faith is a confession or convinced atheists.
When and where to hold the ceremony?
After you are convinced that you can get married, it is necessary to determine the procedure of the wedding, as well as the venue. If you want a bright ceremony, which is possible to hold widely and with a large number of spectators, then you need to go to a large temple.
If you are fond of secluded activities, then you will enjoy the small and cozy churches. To choose exactly “that place”, you must walk through the churches and listen to your feelings, they will prompt you to tell you exactly where your ceremony should go.
By tradition, the wedding ceremony of the newlyweds can be carried out only on certain days of the week, and it should also be borne in mind that during the period of many days this ceremony is also not held.
Also, if you are serious about this event, it is better not to set a wedding date on the day after the church holidays, as after serving, the priests are often tired and do not willingly spend the whole upcoming ceremony.
It should be borne in mind that in most churches and temples, the wedding is carried out by appointment, you must agree on this with the priest, having chosen the date you need in advance.
It can also be, especially if the temple is large, that the ceremony will be held not only for your couple, but also for several more at the same time. If this fact confuses you, then this moment also needs to be discussed in advance.
At the same time, the ceremony itself is being discussed with the priest, you must clarify whether you will marry the singers. And, by the way, it is better to do this, because in this case the whole process becomes more colorful, which leads to a rapid flow of time.
How is it going?
The whole procedure takes about 40-60 minutes, usually the wedding is carried out after the service, so rarely starts on time, most likely you will have to wait a long time. But you can’t do anything here, you have to be patient, and the bride is better not to wear high heels, after standing for hours you start to appreciate convenience.
When the bride and groom must be crosses in which they were baptized, without them the priest will not begin the sacrament of the wedding.
You should have two rings with you - one gold and the other silver. Before the ceremony, they are put on the throne, and then sanctified. During the wedding, the priest should bless you three times, read a short prayer and betrothal you with rings, changing them three times from the hand of the husband to the hand of the wife.
Also before the ceremony, special candles are ordered, which the newlyweds will hold in their hands until the very end of the service. And the last thing you need to have with you is wedding icons, which depict Christ and the Virgin Mary, as well as two white towels.
In the church, the groom must stand on the right, and the bride on the left. Above their heads, the heads of the ceremony are holding crowns, so try to select witnesses that are taller, otherwise a similar mission for them may simply become impossible.
Basic traditions and superstitions
By tradition, the bride should be in a white dress with a covered head. The dress should not be too lush and fanciful; a modest dress of light or cream tones will be enough.
If you do decide to get married in a wedding dress, then it should not have a deep neckline and tightly fit the figure. Chest, arms and back should not be open, so you need to purchase a special cloak that will cover all this. Pay attention to the train dress. There is a superstition that the longer and richer the bridal dress train, the life of the newlyweds will be longer and happier.
Рушник, который молодые использую в процессе венчания, должен навсегда остаться в семье, его нельзя никому отдавать. Этот рушник является символом новой совместной жизненной дороги молодожёнов. Также всю жизнь хранятся венчальные свечи, но есть поверье, что их можно зажигать при трудных родах либо при тяжелой болезни детей.
Who can be a witness at the wedding, and who is not?
The function of the witnesses (guarantors) at the wedding ceremony is not only to help the newlyweds during the ceremony. They become the spiritual mentors of the new family, who help the young over the years of marriage to successfully cope with difficulties, deal with conflict situations, and send the family union with wise advice and admonitions. The choice of guarantors for the wedding should be approached responsibly, guided by common sense.
Witnesses can be a husband and wife who have been in a strong, legal marriage for a long time, who are authorities for both newlyweds. If there are no such married couples among familiar newlyweds, then close friends or relatives of the bride and groom are invited for the wedding ceremony. It is important to remember that if the guarantors are not married to the sacrament, then after the ceremony they will become spiritual relatives, they will be prohibited from entering into a church marriage.
Witnesses at the wedding can not be divorced spouse. They could not keep their family union and, in the opinion of church canons, will become poor spiritual mentors to the newlyweds. It is forbidden to take men and women living in a civil marriage as assistants to the wedding. The unregistered marriage unions formed in defiance of the sacred commandments are not approved by the Orthodox Church.
Ancient traditions and rules of the church rite
Traditions, church wedding rules have not changed much over time. Depending on the location of the sacrament, the ceremony lasts from 40 minutes in the parish church to 60 minutes in the monastery. All participants in the sacrament must be baptized or be baptized, otherwise they are not allowed to the wedding. A few days before the sacrament, you must go to church: to confess, to take communion. Immediately before the rite you can not eat, have sex.
According to the canons of the Orthodox Church during the wedding, the witness should be dressed in a dress or a skirt covering her knees, her head covered with a scarf or a scarf. Deep neckline, bare shoulders, overly revealing outfits are strictly forbidden for women. The witness is in the church without a headdress. In case of violation of these rules, the clergyman may not allow the guarantors to the ceremony or completely refuse to hold the sacrament.
By tradition, the church ceremony takes place in several stages:
- Betrothal. At the entrance to the church, the clergyman conducting the wedding ceremony blesses the newlyweds thrice, reading the prayers, gives lighted candles and rings. After the ritual of betrothal, the young become officially the bride and groom.
- Wedding. The betrothed couple passes to the center of the church, stands in front of a lectern on a white towel embroidered with prayers. Witnesses stand on both sides of the bride and the groom. The priest begins the ceremony: reads prayers, lays wreaths on the heads of the newlyweds, or they are held by guarantors. Then the bride and groom taste the wine, exchange sacred oaths. The ceremony ends with a procession around the lectern three times, symbolizing the entry into a new family life. The priest removes the crowns, blesses the newly-made spouses.
- The resolution of the crowns. After the wedding, a prayer begins, containing wishes, prayers to God to save the marriage union for many years, to bless the newlyweds in family life. At the end of the prayer, the priest spends the release: takes the candles from the spouses, congratulates them with the joy of receiving the blessing of the union from the Lord, takes them to the pulpit so that the young spouses kiss the icons of Christ and Our Lady.
- Thanksgiving prayer. At the end of the wedding on the ambon in front of the royal gates, thanksgiving prayer begins, after which all those present are blessed to go out of the temple. The church bells begin to ring, announcing the common joy, grace.
The church wedding of the newlyweds is currently taking place, including all four stages. During the ceremony, photos and videos of the process are allowed. Close relatives, guests of the newlyweds can attend the ceremony, watch the performance of the sacrament. Beautiful wedding ceremony of a young couple after the wedding, see the video:
Obligations of Witnesses during the Sacrament
During the performance of the sacrament of the church, certain responsibilities are assigned to the witnesses. The rules and actions that assistants of the newlyweds will have to perform are determined and agreed in advance with the Orthodox clergyman of the chosen church so that during the ceremony there will be no different overlaps and problems.
Traditional responsibilities of the guarantors of the wedding:
- Serve wedding rings.
- Lay a white towel before lectern.
- Hold the crowns over the heads of the bride and groom.
- Accompany the newlyweds during the triple procession.
- To help collect bouquets after the ceremony.
What is accepted to give young?
Wedding is a religious ceremony that unites the newlyweds before the God and people to the end of the life of the soul. After the ceremony, newlyweds are presented with special gifts: icons and coins with the faces of saints, patronizing young couples, a bible in gift binding, lamps, iconostasis shelves, candlesticks for church candles, a trip to the shrines.
A popular gift for a married couple - wedding icons:
- "Family Icon", which depicts the Mother of God with the faces of the saints, patronizing the newlyweds.
- Icon of Saints Peter and Fevroni, preserving the marriage union of a young couple.
- "Vzygranie baby" - an icon with the image of the Mother of God, patronizing young mothers, women who want to have children.
Is it possible to get married without witnesses?
The presence of witnesses at the wedding ceremony is a tradition, and not the statutory canon of the Orthodox Church. If a young couple finds it difficult to choose the guarantors of the rite, the sacrament can be performed only with their participation. Be sure to negotiate these circumstances in advance with the priest who will hold the church wedding.
Wedding is a sacrament that binds indissoluble bonds not only between newlyweds, but creates a special connection between the bride and the witnesses to the ceremony. The election of guarantors for the ceremony means the recognition of the full confidence of the newlyweds to these people. The spiritual connection between them will last for many years, serve as the basis for mentoring and guiding the family life of the newlyweds.